A history of popular music, as told by 100 one-hit wonders (part 6)

49. Santa Esmeralda –•– Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood — (Peaked: February 18, 1978 at # 15)        

The Citizen Kane of disco records.

48. The Church –•– Under the Milky Way — (Peaked: June 18, 1988 at # 24)                     

Emo classic with a secret connection to the LA singer-songwriter scene of the 70s. It was produced by Waddy Wachtel (Linda Ronstadt’s guitarist) and Greg Ladanyi (who produced several Jackson Browne albums); the drummer is Russ Kunkel (Jackson Browne and Crosby and Nash’s bands, and the former Mr. Carly Simon). The “bagpipe” solo was a bow played on guitar, then fed into an electronic keyboard.

47. Randy Newman –•– Short People — (Peaked: January 28, 1978 at # 2)          

46. Loudon Wainwright III –•– Dead Skunk — (Peaked: March 31, 1973 at # 16)               

Randy Newman and Loudon Wainwright III came from storied families (Newman had three uncles who wrote Hollywood film scores; Wainwright’s father was a journalist and editor-in-chief of Life magazine) and from the start, both were cordoned off into the “clever artist with a cult following” category. The subject matter of these two songs was universal enough to give each a major hit record, the only two of their long careers.

45. The Penguins –•– Earth Angel — (Peaked: February 5, 1955 at # 8)                                

When WOR-FM changed from underground rock to oldies, it introduced the new format by playing its top 500 songs of all-time (and at that point, “all time” only meant about 15 years). Figuring my musical education was more important, I faked being ill so I could stay home from school to listen. The top two were disappointing because I’d never heard of either “In The Still of the Night” by the Five Satins or "Earth Angel" before, but looking back they made perfect sense, soulful R&B ballads that provided a soundtrack for 50s teenagers to slow dance or make out to. Years later, when WNEW-FM offered its own top 500 of all-time, with the inevitable top two of “Stairway to Heaven” and “Won’t Get Fooled Again” – that was much more disappointing.

44. Harry Simeone Chorale –•– The Little Drummer Boy — (Peaked: January 12, 1959 at # 13)

Christmas music isn’t supposed to be haunting, but "The Little Drummer Boy" kind of scared me as a kid, with the hypnotic drone “drumbeat” underneath the choir. As peaceful as stepping outside from a noisy family gathering on Christmas Eve into the cold dark.

43. Reunion –•– Life Is a Rock (But the Radio Rolled Me) — (Peaked: November 16, 1974 at #8)

42. Pete Wingfield –•– Eighteen with a Bullet — (Peaked: November 29, 1975 at # 15)

In the time it takes for "Life Is A Rock" to unroll, the names of more than 125 singers, bands, producers, record labels, deejays and dance crazes fly by, keeping Billboard subscribers and the nerds who collected the weekly radio station surveys busy for weeks deciphering it (and an idea later co-opted, with all the fun removed, by Billy Joel in “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”) Pete Wingfield was a British recording session keyboard player with a white-guy Afro and remarkable vocal range whose moment of glory was "Eighteen With A Bullet" – a doo wop homage that used music business terms as metaphors for a romance.

41. Zager and Evans –•– In the Year 2525 — (Peaked: July 12, 1969 at # 1)                         

"In the Year 2525" – not to forget its pompously parenthetical sub-title, Exordium & Terminus – stayed at #1 for six weeks through the summer of 1969 – making it the most successful one-hit wonder record ever. Although the lyrics weren’t much more imaginative in describing a dystopian future than your average issue of DC Comics’ Kamandi, it was nominated for a Hugo, the science fiction literary version of an Oscar. 

 

Hey, look what’s finally on TV! C.C. and Company (1970)

Joe Namath’s first movie role isn’t a travesty. He has the amiable laid-back vibe you get when non-actors wind up with major movie roles (Willie Nelson, the Beatles) and not much in the way of dialogue (or at least many lines of dialogue strung together) so there’s no need for any emotional heavy lifting.

However, having finally sat through all of C.C. and Company for perhaps the first time confirmed that the first five minutes of the movie are its high point. Namath, playing the cleanest-cut gang member to ever grace a motorcycle movie, pretends to be grocery shopping while actually making a sandwich by stealing food from the shelves (and resealing packages as he goes along – the golden age of product tampering). Joe washes down his sandwich with a stolen pint of milk, then helps himself to a package of Twinkies.

From that point forward, C.C. and Company plays like an R-rated Elvis movie, with Namath as the loner with a chip on his shoulder but a heart of gold, quick with his fists and in making time with the gals. He even gets a cool Elvis character name, C.C. Ryder. And not unlike most Elvis movies, C.C. and Company ends with a climactic motorcycle race because there’s always some big car race/moment of truth where Elvis redeems himself in the eyes of his female costar and wipes the smirk off the face of his male competitor.

The movie was written by Mr. Ann-Margret, Roger Smith, no doubt in an effort to jumpstart his wife’s lagging career. According to IMDB, her last role before C.C. and Company was a guest spot on The Lucy Show (the one where Desi Jr. thinks she’s coming on to him after she shows an interest in a song he wrote, easily one of the longest half-hours in television history). If the idea was to start her movie comeback, why not harken back to Ann-Margret’s best – and already five years ago at this point – cinematic effort, Viva Las Vegas?

So any resemblance to an Elvis movie seems intentional, but there’s no way Presley would have signed on for C.C. and Company. There’s beer guzzling, disrespect for authority, a biker chick skinny-dipping, a couple of blurry nude biker asses and Ann-Margret telling a biker to fuck off. And not that Roger Smith would have welcomed Elvis anyway, as the King and the then-single Ann-Margret had a major thing going during the filming of Viva Las Vegas. Namath, at the time one of the best-known and recognizable people in America, got the call.

After their not-so-cute first meeting (Namath steps in to stop two of his motorcycle buddies from raping Ann-Margret when her limo breaks down in the desert), he quits the gang to court her. They hit a dance club, and to compare Namath with a quarterback contemporary, his dance moves are strictly Johnny Unitas – he stays in the pocket and doesn’t move around much. Ann-Margret, on the other hand, only seems to dance at one speed, a hair-whipping frenzy. Afterwards we cut to the two of them rolling around in a dark room, where it’s safe to say that Namath isn’t wearing his knee brace. Happy to be a Giants fan in 1970, with boring Fran Tarkenton at quarterback.

That’s followed by the “falling in love” montage as they feed ducks and ride a pedal boat as “Today: The Love Theme from C.C. and Company” (according to the credits) and sung by Miss Margret provides a suitable soundtrack. (I’m reasonably sure this isn’t the song Desi Jr. wrote for her). The rest of the movie includes several scenes of the motorcycle gang – in the best biker movie tradition – generally behaving like the monkeys in 2001: A Space Odyssey. There’s an endless moto-cross race with lots of riders wiping out and the big bike race/duel to the death at the end, Namath vs. his former gang.

For as many times as I tried to watch C.C. and Company, I probably did myself a favor by going to bed after the sandwich scene.

Hey, look what’s finally on TV! C.C. and Company used to air often on the CBS 11:30 movie on Friday and Saturday night. It would have taken a Herculean effort to stay up until 1 AM, with commercials, to watch the whole thing. Fittingly, TCM aired it recently late on a Saturday night.

 

A history of popular music, as told by 100 one-hit wonders (part 5)

60. Lorne Greene –•– Ringo — (Peaked: December 5, 1964 at #1) 

59. Ian Whitcomb –•– You Turn Me On — (Peaked: July 17, 1965 at #8)               

If a rising tide lifts all boats, then the British Invasion helped these two songs. "Ringo" had nothing to do with, you know, the real Ringo. It was a spoken-word tale of a gunslinger with Lorne Greene at his most sonorous. "You Turn Me On" was good enough to stand on its own merits, a boogie-woogie workout with Brit Ian Whitcomb singing in a breathless, feminine falsetto, fueling playground accusations that he was gay. 

58. The Hollywood Argyles –•– Alley Oop — (Peaked: July 11, 1960 at #1)           

Hollywood record producer Gary Paxton was The Hollywood Argyles. Fast forward several decades from this record and Paxton, then producing gospel music records, became People magazine fodder when he was accused of having an affair with Tammy Faye Bakker, although he insisted they were just friends, and not in the biblical sense. 

57. Paul Mauriat and His Orchestra –•– Love Is Blue — (Peaked: February 10, 1968 at # 1) 

Stuffy instrumental you could only wait out when it played on the radio, but at #1 for five weeks, it was a long wait. Neil Young said he was fooling around trying to play this on his guitar when he stumbled onto the chords for “Heart of Gold.” 

56. Kyu Sakamoto –•– Sukiyaki — (Peaked: June 15, 1963 at # 1)        

55. The Singing Nun –•– Dominique — (Peaked: December 7, 1963 at # 1)                      

Six months separate two of the strangest records to ever reach #1. The Japanese lyrics of "Sukiyaki" are vaguely about dejection over a lost love but were actually written in frustration following a failed student demonstration against the continued post-World War II American military presence in Japan. The title, which has nothing to do with the song, was chosen because it was a term recognizably Japanese and familiar to most Americans – almost like retitling “Dominque” with its French lyrics, “Croissant.” "Dominique" existed in the strange twilight that hung over America between the Kennedy assassination and Beatlemania – the Singing Nun appeared on Ed Sullivan in January 1964, one month before the Beatles. Citing financial difficulties, she and a female friend committed suicide together in 1985. 

54. The Trade Winds –•– New York’s A Lonely Town — (Peaked: March 6, 1965 at # 32)

California dreaming on such a winter's day. In an episode of Mad Men, Don Draper and Harry go to a concert to sign the Rolling Stones to cut a commercial jingle for Heinz Ketchup – not such a reach as the Stones in their early days did ads for Kellogg’s in the UK. Backstage, Harry somehow gets confused and winds up signing opening act the Trade Winds instead. 

53. Iron Butterfly –•– In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida — (Peaked: October 26, 1968 at # 30)            

There was plenty of fat to be trimmed from the original 17-minute version of "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida" to make this AM-friendly version, although when I hear the edited single, my mind starts to replay the deleted drum solo, like when you have a tooth removed and you keep probing around, looking for it with your tongue. 

52. Rosie and the Originals –•– Angel Baby — (Peaked: January 23, 1961 at # 5)            

Rosie was 14 when she wrote "Angel Baby" for her boyfriend. The group was offered a recording contract – cue the “Jaws” theme – under the condition that the record label take possession of the master recording and that the oldest Original, not Rosie, be listed as the writer. Ineligible to collect royalties because she wasn’t credited as the writer, decades of litigation followed. John Lennon was an admirer of the amateurish charm of this record, recording a version in the 70s. 

51. Mickey & Sylvia –•– Love Is Strange — (Peaked: March 2, 1957 at # 11)    

50. Shirley & Company –•– Shame, Shame, Shame — (Peaked: March 29, 1975 at # 12)

Sylvia Robinson earned her spot on the Mount Rushmore of one-hit wonders. As half of Mickey & Sylvia, their "Love Is Strange" went to #11 – what is strange is why this song never charted higher, given how well known it is and how often it gets used on soundtracks. Eight years later, Robinson wrote the irresistible disco hit "Shame, Shame, Shame" – John Lennon was an admirer, one of the few rock stars to admit to liking some disco music. Recording as Sylvia in 1973, she was a one-hit wonder with the embarrassing top ten hit “Pillow Talk,” before founding the hip hop label Sugar Hill, home of yet another one-hit wonder, the Sugar Hill Gang’s “Rapper’s Delight” in 1979.

 

Hey, look what’s finally on TV! Let the Good Times Roll (1973)

There was a void in rock music in the early 70s that was filled by a revival of 50s rock & roll. Sha Na Na was playing the Filmore East and Woodstock. WCBS-FM changed its format to all-oldies and handed over Sunday nights to doo-wop scholar Gus Gossert. Madison Square Garden began hosting – and selling out – package shows of 50s artists, has-beens and relics to the outside world, but royalty to the reformed juvenile delinquents and greasers who lined up for tickets.

My friends and I attended one of those Rock & Roll Revivals, as they were billed, the infamous Garden Party in October 1971. (Two of my first three concerts were the Garden Party and a January 1973 concert during which Neil Young announced that the Vietnam War was over with the signing of the Paris Peace Treaty that evening – excuse me for thinking every show I’d ever attend would be eventful). My memory of the bill at the Garden that night is hazy (and there’s no reliable online resource to help), but I do remember Little Eva and Rick (Not Ricky) Nelson, plus show-closers Bo Diddley and Chuck Berry.

There’s commentary online from people WHO WERE AT THE CONCERT insisting that the booing during Nelson’s set was directed at cops hassling (to use the vernacular of the day) some kids smoking weed. It’s not true and the Rick (Not Ricky) distinction is important. Distancing himself from being the annoying kid brother on that annoyingly corny television show, Nelson took the stage with a band of LA session musicians playing countrified versions of his old hits and a few covers.

I’m sure they were good, but nobody was listening. There was a twang (mostly courtesy of a pedal steel guitar) to the music that didn’t go down well on 33^rd Street in those days when us city folk generally considered country and western “shit-kicker music” and a joke funny above the Mason-Dixon line. Nelson got it right on “Garden Party” – he didn’t look the part and the music didn’t fit. Of course, he got the last laugh with “Garden Party” going top ten and later fathering the twin boys who fronted the atrocious rock band Nelson. 

Let The Good Times Roll, filmed around the same time as the Garden Party, captured similar revivals. There’s Bo Diddley and Chuck Berry, looking and sounding much like they did the night we saw them – Bo stutter-stepping, Chuck duck walking – tried and true schtick that the sold-out crowd ate up. It was exciting and still one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. Let The Good Times Roll does a great job, sometimes using split screens and “psychedelic” camera tricks, of capturing that excitement.

Other highlights from Let the Good Times Roll: Chubby Checker, minus his American Bandstand baby fat, turning the Twist into an Olympic sport; Little Richard sitting in his dressing room accepting visitors (including Chubby and Bill Haley) like the queen; and Rob Reiner introducing the Coasters with a dead-on impersonation of Murray the K’s hyperactive jive talk. Reiner grew up in the suburbs of Westchester County; obviously he spent a lot of time listening to New York City radio.

Hey, look what’s finally on TV! I bet it’s been more than 20 years since I last watched Let The Good Times Roll before TCM showed it over the Labor Day weekend.

 

 

 

 

 

A history of popular music as told by 100 one-hit wonders (part 4) 

70. Maurice Williams and the Zodiacs –•– Stay — (Peaked: November 21, 1960 at # 1)  

"Stay" doesn’t actually stay very long, clocking in at 1:36, the shortest record to reach #1.

69. Miriam Makeba –•– Pata Pata — (Peaked: November 25, 1967 at # 12)        

Miriam Makeba fun facts: She was married to a fellow South African, trumpeter Hugh Masekela (another one-hit wonder with “Grazing in the Grass” in 1968), as well as Black Panther leader Stokely Carmichael (not at the same time).

68. The Chakachas –•– Jungle Fever — (Peaked: March 25, 1972 at # 8)

The list of songs with orgasmic moaning in the mix includes Donna Summers’ “Love to Love You,” Serge Gainsbourg and Jane Birkin’s pornographic tour de force “Je t’amie,” Robert Plant’s heavy breathing during the “psychedelic” instrumental break on “Whole Lotta Love,” “Pillow Talk” by Sylvia (who will come up again later on this list) and "Jungle Fever" – a record you never wanted to come up on the radio if you were trapped in the car with your parents.

67. Buckner & Garcia –•– Pac-Man Fever — (Peaked: March 27, 1982 at # 9)

Underemployed and with too much time on my hands, I began to search out the bowling alleys and makeshift arcades where I might find the jolt I needed, a trip to a universe where I was the unforgiving, stalking predator. With enough quarters and a shaking hand on the throttle, there was Pac-Man. In a pinch, Ms. Pac-Man worked just as well.

66. The Fendermen –•– Mule Skinner Blues — (Peaked: July 11, 1960 at # 5) 

This song always struck me as a kind of silly novelty song, then I came across Dolly Parton’s dynamite version from 1970. Turns out to date back to the early 30s and is something of a country standard. The Fendermen (true to their name) introduced electric guitars, but it still veers awfully close to novelty record status. The lame “cha cha cha” ending doesn’t help its case.

65. Johnny Ace –•– Pledging My Love — (Peaked: March 19, 1955 at # 17)

Johnny Ace, 25, was playing around with his revolver backstage at a 1954 concert. Someone told him to be careful. Just after he claimed, “Gun’s not loaded,” it went off, the starting pistol that sent his "Pledging My Love," released posthumously, to #17 nationally and #1 on the R&B charts for 10 weeks. Billboard at the time said Ace's death "created one of the biggest demands for a record that has occurred since the death of Hank Williams just over two years ago." Paul Simon was old to enough to be affected by Ace’s death and his “The Late Great Johnny Ace” connects Ace’s death with that of two other Johns, Kennedy and Lennon. 

64. Desmond Dekker and the Aces –•– Israelites — (Peaked: June 28, 1969 at # 9)   

Despite the often-unintelligible lyrics, "The Israelties" was the first reggae song to hit the U.S. top ten. Some say the first was Millie Small’s “My Boy Lollipop,” which had more of that skip-along ska beat instead.

63. The Knickerbockers –•– Lies — (Peaked: January 22, 1966 at #20)                   

The fab "Lies" was the first, and still one of the best, Beatlesque records. Even with “We Can Work It Out” and “Day Tripper” concurrently in the U.S. top ten, the Lennon-styled vocals and guitar work (sounding more like the Who in spots), pushed “Lies” to #20. The band hailed from Bergenfield and took its name from local Knickerbocker Road, which ironically doesn’t run at all through Bergenfield. Keeping that Garden State spirit alive, a reincarnated version of the band called itself Lodi.

62. John Zacherle –•– Dinner with Drac–Part 1 — (Peaked: March 31, 1958 at #6)           

Halloween 1966: Wearing football shoulder pads and nose putty globbed over my face, I stood on a long line to meet The Cool Ghoul, Zacherle, in front of Bamberger’s at the Garden State Plaza. It must have been some sort of costumer contest, and as each kid filed past, Zach made a joke or comment. My turn. Zach asks me who I’m supposed to be. I tell him the Hunchback. Zach: “Wait till your mother sees all that bubblegum on your face.”

61. The Elvin Bishop Band –•– Fooled Around and Fell in Love — (Peaked: May 22, 1976 at #3) 

As with the Beatles’ “Something” and Wings’ “My Love,” two other love songs I always found tedious, "Fooled Around" redeems itself with an inspired guitar solo by Elvin Bishop, who at one time in the late 60s was considered one of the great white wonders of blues guitar.

 

Hey, look what’s finally on TV! Johnny Cool (1963)

Henry Silva had a long film career playing mostly Indians or ethic types when he wasn’t in a role supporting any combination of Rat Pack members, including The Manchurian Candidate with Frank Sinatra or as one of the second-tier members of Ocean’s Eleven, along with professional sourpusses Richard Conte, Norman Fell and Joey Bishop.

With Silva in a rare lead role, a Rat Pack breeze blows through Johnny Cool. Sinatra musical accomplices Sammy Cahn and Billy May wrote the swinging soundtrack. Sammy Davis Jr. and Joey Bishop have cameos and the film’s executive producer is Peter Lawford. (Lawford gets an “in name only” cameo, billed on a Desert Inn marquee that Silva drives past).

Silva plays a Sicilian Robin Hood-styled folk hero named Giordano, who gets shanghaied by an American mafioso in exile into knocking off a bunch of competing mob bosses. Now an assassin renamed Johnny Cool, his reptilian features and cold-blooded march across America finding creative ways to cross off the names on his hit list – including machine gunning a gangland boss in his office from a window-washer scaffold and throwing a suitcase bomb into a pool – is making the Mob nervous. As one FBI agent on his trail says, “Everybody remembers him, but nobody knows him.”

Sammy, Liz and Henry

What really makes Johnny Cool cool is the strong supporting cast of recognizable faces. Jim Backus is a corrupt construction company owner (who twice sneaks out a Mr. Magoo laugh off camera). Telly Savalas plays a competing mob boss. A couple of curious casting choices play casino operators. John McGiver’s stern high school principal look and patrician delivery makes his veiled threat of forcing sexual favors from a woman who can’t pay her casino bill even creepier. As McGiver’s partner, political satirist Mort Sahl isn’t much of an actor (and seems to need a shave as well). All four get violently knocked off by Johnny Cool.

John McGiver and Mort Sahl

Sammy Davis Jr. plays a bystander in a backroom craps game with the unlikely name of “Educated.” Elizabeth Montgomery is a bored divorcee inexplicably drawn to dangerous Johnny and in a party scene we get a glimpse of what might happen if Samantha Stevens got out of control at one of those suburban cocktail soirees – dancing the twist with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other; then waking up the next morning hungover, with disheveled hair and wrapped in a blanket, presumably either topless or naked. When she and Johnny rendezvous at one point in a Las Vegas hotel room, she gets to cry out, “I need you! I need you right now!” Hubba hubba.

(Montgomery and Johnny Cool director William Asher met on the set. Within a year they divorced their spouses and were married to each other. Asher, who also directed several beach party movies, later became executive producer on Bewitched).

As an actor better known for his looks than his acting, Silva comes off a little stiff at times, as do most of the mob characters, whose dialogue is awkwardly formal. But the many guest stars (which also includes  Joey Bishop, Elisha Cook Jr. and Richard Anderson) give the film the spirit of a more-violent Burke's Law episode. A fun movie and always worth catching the rate times it airs on TV.

Hey, look what’s on TV! Johnny Cool plays on TCM every couple of years or so; another cable channel occasionally shows a version edited for commercials.

 

 

 

 

A history of popular music as told by 100 one-hit wonders (part 3) 

The ground rules are in part 1 

80. Soft Cell –•– Tainted Love — (Peaked: July 17, 1982 at # 8)  

Another in the long tradition of British bands covering American R&B records, "Tainted Love"was originally a minor hit for Gloria Jones in 1964, who has another, unfortunate connection with a British musician as the driver of the car that hit a tree, killing her passenger and boyfriend Marc Bolan in 1977. 

79. Tom Clay –•– What the World Needs Now Is Love/Abraham, Martin and John — (Peaked: August 14, 1971 at # 8) 

There was an earnestness to the radio during the summer of 1971, what with “You’ve Got A Friend,” “Indian Reservation,” “Colour My World” (note the very earnest spelling), “Signs,” “Mercy Mercy Me” and Tom Clay’s collage “What the World Needs Now Is Love/Abraham, Martin and John,” which mixed soundbites from John and Bobby Kennedy, and Martin Luther King, with the TV and radio announcements of their deaths. Heavy-handed, ghoulish and a bummer whenever it came on the radio; you’d sit through and hope the next song was something a little more upbeat. 

78. Senator Bobby –•– Wild Thing — (Peaked: February 4, 1967 at # 20)

Political satire was a lot easier back then. Bobby Kennedy had that funny Boston accent and eleven kids, both key elements to this record. Unfortunately, "Wild Thing" opens with the studio engineer calling for “take 72,” an allusion to the 1972 presidential election and the seemingly bright future in store for the senator from New York. 

77. Bruce Channel –•– Hey! Baby — (Peaked: March 10, 1962 at # 1)     

When this Texas singer toured his only hit through the UK, the Beatles opened a few of his shows. The story is that Channel’s harmonica player, Delbert McClinton, showed John Lennon a few harmonica riffs, which Lennon morphed into the backing for “Love Me Do.” McClinton was a one-hit wonder himself with “Giving It Up For Your Love” (#8 in 1981). 

76. Dave Brubeck Quartet –•– Take Five — (Peaked: October 9, 1961 at # 25)    

I have a hazy memory of puppets on a kid’s show (Sandy Becker? Chuck McCann?) doing some sort of skit behind this song. 

75. Deodato –•– Also Sprach Zarathustra (2001) — (Peaked: March 31, 1973 at # 2)       

Richard Strauss’ 1896 classical piece has become easy shorthand for the entrance of something momentous, epic and grand. Not surprisingly it was the music that accompanied Elvis Presley’s arrival onstage. This jazzy version shed the pomposity and was used ironically in the movie Being There when Pete Sellers finally leaves the mansion he’s never set foot out of, revealing a neighborhood that has completely fallen apart in the interim. 

74. The Wonder Who? –•– Don’t Think Twice — (Peaked: December 25, 1965 at # 12) 

Everybody who heard this on the radio immediately knew it was the Four Seasons, so that Wonder Who bit wasn’t fooling anybody. But the concept is strange. What if Frankie Valli sang an entire song in falsetto? And it was a Dylan song? 

73. R. Dean Taylor –•– Indiana Wants Me — (Peaked: November 7, 1970 at # 5)             

The 70s were full of records like "Indiana Wants Me", story songs with enough plot for a 90-minute made-for-television movie. In a mythical Aaron Spelling production, our hero (Michael Ontkean) has killed a man who insulted his wife (Kate Jackson) and is on the run until, "Red lights are flashin' around me/Yeah, love, it looks like they found me.” (The role of the gruff Indiana sheriff who admires Ontkean but must do his job and bring him in goes to George Kennedy). The song’s ending, with its police sirens, gunfire and bullhorn demands to surrender has a clumsy charm and may have served as an inspiration for Stevie Wonder’s little radio play of cops arresting the innocent hayseed at the end of “Living For the City.” 

72. Dr. Buzzard’s Original Savannah Band –•– Cherchez La Femme — (Peaked: January 29, 1977 at # 27)

Retro disco/swing sounding like a cross between Cab Calloway and the Pointer Sisters, “Cherchez La Femme” gets docked a point for the gratuitous mention of Tommy Mottola, record company executive and the group’s benefactor, who didn’t need the publicity. Boy, you didn’t see groups like the Beatles write songs about their manager … oh wait … “Baby You’re A Rich Man.” 

71. Toni Basil –•– Mickey — (Peaked: December 11, 1982 at # 1)            

Highlights from Toni Basil's Zelig-like show business career: Dancing with Elvis Presley in Viva Las Vegas, her first film; Playing one of the two hookers in Easy Rider who drop acid, take off their clothes and freak out in the cemetery; Choreographing the video for “Once In A Lifetime” (and in doing so creating the “David Byrne” nutty persona); Founding – and as its token white member – The Lockers dance troupe, before giving her spot to smooth-moving fat kid Fred Berry.