A history of popular music as told by 100 one-hit wonders (part 3) 

The ground rules are in part 1 

80. Soft Cell –•– Tainted Love — (Peaked: July 17, 1982 at # 8)  

Another in the long tradition of British bands covering American R&B records, "Tainted Love"was originally a minor hit for Gloria Jones in 1964, who has another, unfortunate connection with a British musician as the driver of the car that hit a tree, killing her passenger and boyfriend Marc Bolan in 1977. 

79. Tom Clay –•– What the World Needs Now Is Love/Abraham, Martin and John — (Peaked: August 14, 1971 at # 8) 

There was an earnestness to the radio during the summer of 1971, what with “You’ve Got A Friend,” “Indian Reservation,” “Colour My World” (note the very earnest spelling), “Signs,” “Mercy Mercy Me” and Tom Clay’s collage “What the World Needs Now Is Love/Abraham, Martin and John,” which mixed soundbites from John and Bobby Kennedy, and Martin Luther King, with the TV and radio announcements of their deaths. Heavy-handed, ghoulish and a bummer whenever it came on the radio; you’d sit through and hope the next song was something a little more upbeat. 

78. Senator Bobby –•– Wild Thing — (Peaked: February 4, 1967 at # 20)

Political satire was a lot easier back then. Bobby Kennedy had that funny Boston accent and eleven kids, both key elements to this record. Unfortunately, "Wild Thing" opens with the studio engineer calling for “take 72,” an allusion to the 1972 presidential election and the seemingly bright future in store for the senator from New York. 

77. Bruce Channel –•– Hey! Baby — (Peaked: March 10, 1962 at # 1)     

When this Texas singer toured his only hit through the UK, the Beatles opened a few of his shows. The story is that Channel’s harmonica player, Delbert McClinton, showed John Lennon a few harmonica riffs, which Lennon morphed into the backing for “Love Me Do.” McClinton was a one-hit wonder himself with “Giving It Up For Your Love” (#8 in 1981). 

76. Dave Brubeck Quartet –•– Take Five — (Peaked: October 9, 1961 at # 25)    

I have a hazy memory of puppets on a kid’s show (Sandy Becker? Chuck McCann?) doing some sort of skit behind this song. 

75. Deodato –•– Also Sprach Zarathustra (2001) — (Peaked: March 31, 1973 at # 2)       

Richard Strauss’ 1896 classical piece has become easy shorthand for the entrance of something momentous, epic and grand. Not surprisingly it was the music that accompanied Elvis Presley’s arrival onstage. This jazzy version shed the pomposity and was used ironically in the movie Being There when Pete Sellers finally leaves the mansion he’s never set foot out of, revealing a neighborhood that has completely fallen apart in the interim. 

74. The Wonder Who? –•– Don’t Think Twice — (Peaked: December 25, 1965 at # 12) 

Everybody who heard this on the radio immediately knew it was the Four Seasons, so that Wonder Who bit wasn’t fooling anybody. But the concept is strange. What if Frankie Valli sang an entire song in falsetto? And it was a Dylan song? 

73. R. Dean Taylor –•– Indiana Wants Me — (Peaked: November 7, 1970 at # 5)             

The 70s were full of records like "Indiana Wants Me", story songs with enough plot for a 90-minute made-for-television movie. In a mythical Aaron Spelling production, our hero (Michael Ontkean) has killed a man who insulted his wife (Kate Jackson) and is on the run until, "Red lights are flashin' around me/Yeah, love, it looks like they found me.” (The role of the gruff Indiana sheriff who admires Ontkean but must do his job and bring him in goes to George Kennedy). The song’s ending, with its police sirens, gunfire and bullhorn demands to surrender has a clumsy charm and may have served as an inspiration for Stevie Wonder’s little radio play of cops arresting the innocent hayseed at the end of “Living For the City.” 

72. Dr. Buzzard’s Original Savannah Band –•– Cherchez La Femme — (Peaked: January 29, 1977 at # 27)

Retro disco/swing sounding like a cross between Cab Calloway and the Pointer Sisters, “Cherchez La Femme” gets docked a point for the gratuitous mention of Tommy Mottola, record company executive and the group’s benefactor, who didn’t need the publicity. Boy, you didn’t see groups like the Beatles write songs about their manager … oh wait … “Baby You’re A Rich Man.” 

71. Toni Basil –•– Mickey — (Peaked: December 11, 1982 at # 1)            

Highlights from Toni Basil's Zelig-like show business career: Dancing with Elvis Presley in Viva Las Vegas, her first film; Playing one of the two hookers in Easy Rider who drop acid, take off their clothes and freak out in the cemetery; Choreographing the video for “Once In A Lifetime” (and in doing so creating the “David Byrne” nutty persona); Founding – and as its token white member – The Lockers dance troupe, before giving her spot to smooth-moving fat kid Fred Berry.